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Pressured Parents, Stressed-out Kids: Carlette Mack

Taken from Pressured Parents, Stressed-out Kids by Wendy S. Grolnick, Ph.D., and Kathy Seal, published by Prometheus Books.

Contributed by Julia Maher of Los Angeles. Read by Carlette Mack: "This reading appeals to me because in my everyday life, I work to repair struggling relationships between parents and children. This reading examines the importance of the parental relationship, encouraging unconditional love and the personal development of values in both the parent and child." Carlette, Director of Program Services for Covenant House Alaska, has lived in Anchorage for 24 years. She is very passionate about youth issues and dedicated to providing a voice for youth, especially those that are homeless and at-risk. Carlette is on the Board of Directors at the YWCA and an avid bowler.

In the book Pressured Parents, Stressed-out Kids, Dr. Wendy Grolnick and Kathy Seal examine what it takes to stay connected with your kids.

"Autonomy is the feeling of initiating an action.

When people feel a sense of autonomy, the feeling that what they do derives from them, they're happier. And they perform better, because the enjoyment motivates them to study or practice more, building up their skills.
...
Some theorists recoil from the idea of autonomy because they connect it to the American archetype of the "rugged individualist." They understand autonomous people as egocentric and separate, rather than being warmly related to their parents, family, and friends.

But that's not my definition. Quite the opposite: autonomy promotes intimacy. It helps you and your child fulfill your basic human need for connection. At first it may seem paradoxical, but promoting a child's feeling of choice and freedom draws you closer."



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